reading Peter

:)
I've been trying to figure out how many kids we're going to have. With number 5 on the way it feels like a milestone in life. There is no going back. You are a man with 5 kids ' Hey there's that guy with 5 kids' ..'what are those people thinking, I find it drives me crazy with just this one little brat of mine'..and so on and so forth. It amazes me how many people are against having big families...but then once you have the next baby they congratulate you - secretly on being an idiot.. well some are genuine but isn't it bizarre how the initial reaction is to think a tragedy has occured. that someone who would do such a thing must be unstable. or religious. or not want to get ahead in life.
I really like our kids. I can't image life knowing that there is nothing I have left on the earth. there is no more to me than what I do and think and say. that when I die, my line is finished.
This little baby looks to be a girl and thats cool cause now Micah can have a sister and we can have two girls. how very cool. I bet they will both be stunners too. strong beautiful women who know who they are. girls who help people and care for them and act like honourable women. they have a good role model in dot. she is all of those things. Dot is an incredible woman and she adds alot to all of our lives. good thing. being married to a bitch of a woman doesn't sound like alot of fun :0
I have been reading Peter tonight. I was thinking about being joyful. Being pleased with everyday knowing that there is a God that offered me salvation from death and that I've accepted it. It was saying that after accepting it there are works that we will be judged on - namely the spreading of the gopel as believers area called to do. Makes sense really. if you believe in something that will show someone what they are here for then you shoudl tell themso they can know it too. sounds reasonable. its terrible that I am a failure. that this task I cannot focus on. that the devil gets the best of me. and I cant seem to offer back to christ the best of myself.
but what a relief to know the mercy of God. i am undeserving. I am truly blessed with lots of kids and a great family and I can't wait to see my long lost friends again. I love you guys out there. I miss out times together and know that they will come again.

Kia ora bro.